Nothing Better.

I'm alittle scared to write another blog. Surprisingly, not because I think you will judge me or think I'm an idiot or a hypocrit, but because I might feel that way about myself.

Looking back at some of the things I've written, it blows my mind how awesome some of that stuff is. Ok, yeah, not like I'm an amazing, profound writer, but just because what it says is true stuff...real stuff. But at the same time, when I wrote it, I didn't even know how real it was. I didn't realize that I often times don't trust God but fool myself into thinking that I'm somehow letting Him have control of my life. I didn't realize that most of the time what I say, write, and justify in my head does not come from what I know is right, from past experiences or other gained knowledge, but instead only from what I've heard is right from "them". I didn't realize that I don't even know who "them/they" are...

Here's what I figure though. God uses things in my life that seem to be of no significance for a huge significance. Or even just things that i think I can grasp the depths and profound greatness of to slap me in the face months, or maybe even years later, and cause me to know truth. I also figure that God can use lessons and stuff like I'm talking about to teach me over and over again, and I guess I'm pretty thankful for that.

Tonight, as I went for a run at 12:17 a.m., God did just that. I think alot of it has to do with having a willing heart. And as hard as that is to come by sometimes, God's the one who will equip me with that, and He always knows what He's doing. Yep...ALWAYS. (and yep, this is one of those things I will look back on and think "gosh, if i only knew that then..." because I probly won't remember that on this night, my Father really did give me the wisdom and the ability to trust Him and know that I don't have to depend on myself because He's totally got my back. It's cool though. That's the fun of writing things down and getting to look back on those words and see how the King has worked in my life. And there's nothing better than that. :)