Psalm 62:5-8

Ps. 62:5-8
"Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken. My salvation and my honor depend on God; He is my mighty rock, my refuge. Trust in Him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge."

Dang. Can I just say that it has been awhile since my soul found the rest I needed in God? I've been shaken. God hasn't been my fortress, people have.
And that pretty much always sucks. Because no matter how great and amazing people can be, they still let you down. This might be because I build them up way too high in the first place and placed crazy expectations on them (uhh, yeah, I don't like it when people do that to me...). Also, maybe I realize that people aren't GOd, so they can't always be right and definitely can't always make me happy. That's where I get in the way and try to do the impossible of measuring up to the quite possibly not even real standards I feel like people want me to live up to...

How silly.

I'm not even sure about the whole part about my salvation and my honor depending on God. I mean sure, I get the salvation part. Without God, there wouldn't even be salvation (Thanks God!) But my honor depends on God...what does that even mean?

Welp, honor is honesty, fairness, or integrity in one's beliefs and actions. OR a source of credit or distinction. OR high respect, as far as worth, merit, or rank. OR high public esteem; fame; glory;, etc...
Depend means to rely on; place trust in or to rely for support, maintenance, help, etc. Or to put trust in, rely on, be sure of. To be influenced or determined by... (thanks dictionary.com)

So yeah, think about that stuff, and if you were lost, maybe it makes more sense now. It does to me.
My salvations and my source of credit, any kind of worth, merit, fame, or glory I get, is determined alone by God.

So. The solution to my problems? Trust in God at ALL TIMES, and pour my heart out to Him, because HE is my refuge! Of course, sometimes it's hard to trust in God, who you can't see and maybe have trouble hearing over your own voice and/or thoughts...ya don't have to tell me. But He tells us to, he wants us to. He even tells us to pour out our hearts to Him! Yeah, like all the stuff you try to keep secret and hide because it's bad or it just sucks or it's scary or maybe stupid...just telllllll Him.

He's our refuge. He's the one that takes care of all our crap and picks us up and keeps us safe. He fixes us when we're broken and rebuilds our foundation when we've been shaken. He gives us a reason to hope.
So, hey God, I'm gona find rest for my crazy soul in You alone.
Maybe next time Africa.